I was on the hunt for some more small businesses to work with when I got in contact with The Butters. They asked which product I was interested in reviewing. After telling them that I have PCOS, they recommended me trying the PMS Rescue Cream, and it was better than I could have imagined!
PMS Rescue is hand made using all vegan ingredients. There are an abundance luxurious oils like coconut, soy, and grape seed. To make things even softer, they add in aloe and shea. There are many other incredible ingredients, but to make this the PMS Rescue, they add Epsom Salt, Peppermint, Neem, Evening Primrose, Clary Sage, and Lemongrass.
When I used this, I had some back pain and cramps. When I went to sleep, I rubbed this all over my lower back and pelvic area. The smell of this cream lulled me right to sleep and I slept amazing! I woke up feeling refreshed and my skin had never felt better.
Unfortunately, there is one big negative to this product. Since all the materials and ingredients are natural, with no added chemicals, the smell that I woke up to the next morning was not entirely pleasant. I’m not sure why or what happened. When using this cream specifically, make sure you’re able to continually rub it in, cover it with another cream, and/or wash it off before letting it sit on you for an extremely extended period of time.
Even with the not so pleasant morning after smell, after trying this product, you can bet your moisturized behind that I will soon be stocking my home with as many Butters products that I can. I love supporting small businesses even more so when all of the products are hand made! There is so much love put into every single bottle. Please, try The Butters for yourself!
I was sent the PMS Rescuese for free by The Butters Hygienicsin exchange for my honest review. If you wish for me to review one or more of your products, contact me! I would love to hear from you!
The Geo C Ring is a amazing cock ring for those who have experience using them and even those who have not. The really nice simple geometric pattern on the outside makes it a little more interesting than just your average silicone c ring. This is just a very nice option to amplify those intimate moments.
The Geo C Ring is made of a stretchy, satin finished silicone. Because it has no motors, it is waterproof and submersible and it is super easy to clean. The outside diameter is 1.75 in and the whole thing is about half of an inch wide.
This is just a classic cock ring. It’s about medium stretchy so if you tried other super stretchy silicone cock rings this might be a little bit of a step up. It is quite a bit tighter and it doesn’t stretch nearly as much as some other basic silicone cock rings I’ve used. You might want to try starting at just the base of the penis and if you’re comfortable with that move to underneath the balls and just kind of see what you like. But as always with cock rings, you should use a nice, water based lube. It just makes the whole experience a little more pleasant.
I would say that if you are on in the market for a very simple, travel friendly cock ring that is actually pretty to look at, I would definitely consider trying this. I’ve tried a few different c-rings and this one is just as good as all the rest, so it’s really up to you on what you’re looking for. But with the quality of silicone, the stretchiness, and the price of this one, you can’t really go wrong.
You can get the Blush Novelties Geo C right HERE and use the code PINKSPACELIME for 10% off!!
I was sent the Geo C Ring for free in exchange for my honest review. If you wish for me to review one or more of your products, contact me! I would love to hear from you!
We’re coming to the end of the year (AND THE DECADE!), so I thought it would be really fun to make a list of all of the products that I have reviewed and fallen in love with this year. I’ll post the links to the blog posts as well as any affiliate links that might be attached to said product. Enjoy!!
I picked the Blush Novelties Noje Quiver for my top spot simply because of how surprised I was by it. In the past, I had always said that pinpoint stimulation doesn’t work for me, but this toy proved that statement wrong. I love this product (and how fast it makes me cum!)
Get the Noje Quiver HERE! Plus you’ll receive $10 off your first order AND free shipping on orders over $55 when you use the code PINKSPACELIME!
The Reece and Rose Mini Massage Wand is a must have for any toy collection. It’s body safe, powerful, and it’s cheap! Reece and Rose makes sure that, no matter who you are, you can always afford to love and pleasure yourself.
Intimate Earth Green Foaming Cleanser is a game changer. This stuff has a multitude of uses. You can use it on your toys and its safe enough to use on your skin in your daily routine. It smells so fresh and leaves your toys squeaky clean, naturally!
Get the Intimate Earth Green Foaming Toy Cleaner HERE!
The Play Mate After Care Towel is wonderful! It is so soft and plush, it will never irritate your skin. The amount that even this little towel can absorb is astonishing. Any little mess will be dry in an instant!
We all want to spice up our sex life once in a while, but sometimes we just don’t have the means to get super fancy. That’s why I’m writing this post. I want you to be able to have as much fun as possible, in and out of the bedroom, with your partner(s). I know there are loads of these types of posts out there, but it never hurts to have more options.
When you’re looking for new items to freshen things up, always be aware of safety. Make sure you’re not putting unsafe items into your body, or using items in a way that could injure you. For this reason, I am just going to list some of the objects that I have used in the past, and some safe ways of using said objects.
Ice cubes are REALLY fun for sensation play. Our bodies are naturally warm, so putting anything on them that immediately cools, will make for a wonderful feeling. On the body, you can run the ice cubes against the skin, or you can hold the ice cubes in your hand above your partner, letting the cold water drip on them. The latter never fails to get a really fun gasp out of me when the first drip hits my skin. For oral it’s pretty simple. Just hold the ice cube in your mouth before going to town on your partner. The ice cube will have cooled your tongue to be just different enough for an amazing feeling on the genitals.
Kitchen utensils work as a great introduction to impact play before investing in the more ‘normal’ or ‘kinkier’ toys. You can use silicone spatulas, wooden spoons, metal icing tool for cakes, etc. The options are pretty limitless. Just keep in mind safety, as I have mentioned before and will continue mentioning until I am blue in the face. Do your research. Figure out the safe zones on the body, especially when diving into any form of impact play.
Scarf, Neck Tie, Sleeping Mask, ETC
This category is very unspecific. You can use multiple items for multiple uses. You can use scarves, neck ties, a sleeping mask, or, hell, even a t shirt if you have one that is large and thin enough. Make a blindfold and play with different sensations, use a scarf or necktie to make some easy hand cuffs, the sky is the limit. There is no reason why you should need to purchase anything for these types of basic play. Plus it can be really sexy and fun.
Clothes pins are…very interesting. This is something that I would only recommend for the people who can handle a little bit of pain, because they’re not gentle. My favorite way of using clothes pins is on my nipples, but ever since I got actual nipple clamps, they haven’t seen much use. Some of the other, kinkier, uses for clothes pins could be full body clamping or labial pinching. Like I said, probably not for the vanilla players, but hey, you never know if something’s your kink until you try it.
I really wanted to add something to this list that wasn’t an object. Spanking doesn’t require anything except a little knowledge and your hand. You might think, why spanking? Well, for one, it’s really fun, and two, it’s a lot more complicated than one might think. There’s the basic spank of hand to ass cheek, but have you thought about changing it up a bit? Play with the way your fingers are spread out, learn the different areas that are safe to spank on and around the bum. There’s so much more to spanking than just the basic way you see in movies or even in porn (because lets be fair, some porn can be fairly vanilla, unless you know where to look).
I am not an expert in anything. These are just my opinions and my experiences. If you have any questions, please do your own research and ask the proper people. I am not responsible for any injury that may or may not occur in using the objects and items mentioned above.
First things first, I’m not here to tell you what squirting is. A few minutes on Google will bring up so many websites that will tell you, in way more detail, what squirting is and different ways to do it. I am simply going to tell you about my life as a squirter and what that means, for me.
I’ve always been able to squirt and, to me, being a squirter means making a huge mess. I’ve gone back and forth on whether or not it’s actually pee (which it totally isn’t…I think), I’ve been worshiped for it, and mocked for it. Needless to say, I have a mixed history with with squirting. I also feel like I squirt…weird. Almost every single website about ‘how to squirt’ makes it seem like it’s only a g-spot thing. That isn’t the case with me. I ONLY squirt from clitoral orgasms.
I recently posted a blog about my lack of orgasm. I am still (sort of) unsure about why I have such a hard time. I deduced that mental illness and medications may be mostly to blame, but I didn’t want that to just be the end of it. I kept experimenting and really trying to understand my body more. After a few weeks of that, I had the realization that sometimes I lose my orgasm because am a squirter. Not in the ‘I’ve squirted a little a few times’ kind of way, but in the way that, for me, is actually sort of embarrassing. I make a huge mess and knowing that prevents me from fully letting go.
I’ve only squirted with a couple of my partners (mostly because I was faking almost all my orgasms from go to 20, but that’s a story for another time). The first time I squirted in front of someone and not just by myself, the look on their face was pure joy. I still don’t understand why since it’s so normal for me and I had seen it so many times in porn. I thought ‘isn’t this what everyone does?’. Oh boy was I wrong. I got an ear full after that.
Unfortunately, I learned that being a squirter isn’t always such a magical thing. At one point I squirted so hard there was HUGE spot of the bed covered in it. I was so surprised at the amount that I texted my boyfriend at the time with a photo. His response was “I hope you’re cleaning that up…”, which he meant as a joke, but I did not take it that way. I was so insecure about the fact that it happens that I didn’t do it again for months. I felt disgusting.
While that definitely left me with some scarring, I bounced back fairly quickly on the orgasm front. I learned new ways to have orgasms that didn’t involve squirting and, even though it was definitely difficult to control something that comes naturally to me, I managed, until recently.
Ever since I figured that out, and become ok with it, I’ve been able to have way more orgasms. Yes, I mess up the sheets almost every time I come, but I don’t always have that mental wall blocking me. If you need to squirt, fucking squirt. While some people may not like it (I suggest mentioning it before you get freaky with someone), anyone who makes you feel like shit about it doesn’t deserve your come all over them.
My advice to anyone who wants to squirt is experiment with yourself, let yourself go, and invest in some amazing clean up towels, which I will be doing a review for later on. There is more than one way to squirt and you need to find your way, and if you can’t, don’t worry, not everyone can. The hardest part about accepting this about myself is that it needs to happen. If I don’t squirt once in a while, my body literally starts rejecting my orgasms. It’s great…
I have said this so many times, especially when it comes to sex and kink, there is no such thing as normal. Normal is whatever you want it to be. If you’re married with 3 kids, ‘normal’ might be once a month. If you’re newly dating someone you find insanely attractive, ‘normal’ might be once per day. That isn’t including SO many other factors that come into play. The most important thing is any relationship is communication. Only you can know what you need and what works for you.
Because this is such a common question, I really wanted to get other peoples opinions and advice on it. I reached out to Korppi King and Kaja Echo to help me put into words what a ‘normal’ sex life might look like. Read what these awesome humans have to say about it below!
This is not an easy question to answer, because there really isn’t a right answer. How much sex is normal to someone depends entirely upon the person, their partners, and even elements of their environment and upbringing. Despite the repetition of sexual standards in magazines, movies, and sitcoms, sex isn’t a one-size-fits-all thing. Sure, books and magazines will tell you that a married couple should be having sex at least three times a week, and you’ll hear people say that you should have at least three orgasms a day, but, in reality, it’s difficult to say how much is too little, just enough or too much without taking individuality into account. Sex and how often you have it is a question of complex, personal, and dynamic rhythms and desires that you can’t really quantify with an easy answer.
Sexual appetite varies from person to person, as does our need for sex within a relationship (if, in fact, that’s how you’re choosing to have sex). Some people need sex. Some people don’t. Some people don’t like sex physically, but may feel attraction to other people. Some people don’t feel sexual attraction or desire, but may or may not enjoy the physical sensations associated with sex. And taking our masturbation habits and our nuanced definitions of the word “sex” into consideration only muddies the situation further. Do we count masturbation in our measurement of our appetite for sex? Or do we count only the acts we perform with other people? In that case, where do we draw the line—mutual masturbation, hand jobs, cunnilingus, or just penetrative sex? No matter how we define and measure sex, the answer will still be different for everyone. Just look at the sexual appetites in my own house, for example. I usually want or need to have sex every other day if not once a day. Sometimes more often. Of my two partners, one needs to have sex about five times a week and the other (typically) wants or needs it much less often. None of us is right or wrong. There’s not really a baseline from which any of us deviates. We’re all just different from each other in how much sex we want.
Environmental, emotional, physical and mental changes can also impact our sex lives. Whether it’s a change in our diet or daily routine or a psychological event or change, our sexual appetites respond to fluctuations in and around us. Some people, for example, respond to depression and anxiety by shutting down their sexual systems. Some people have the completely opposite reaction. Even if we don’t realize it, our health, self image, energy level and mindset plays a big part in how aroused and arousing we feel. And so do changes in around relationships or in our routines with each other. I can’t tell you how much my libido spiked when one of my partners and I took ballroom dance classed together—nor can I try to explain how little sexual energy I felt when the same partner and I went to a tantric sex workshop just a month later. Sometimes it doesn’t make sense—and maybe it’s a change we don’t even notice—but it impacts our sex life and temporarily changes our definition of normal.
Simply put, there is no normal. Not for everyone. Instead of asking yourself how much sex is normal, try asking “How much sex is healthy and comfortable for me?” Ask yourself first if your needs are met and if you are comfortable and satisfied without the amount of sex you’re having. If the answer to those questions is yes, ask yourself if the amount of sex you have is hurting you, hurting someone else, or hampering your ability to function in the rest of your life at or above your functionality baseline. If the answer is no, it could be worth taking some time to reevaluate your sex attitudes and routines.
Most of us have deeply ingrained, socially reinforced ideas about how much and what kind of sex we should be having. Media of all kinds is constantly showing us imagery of happy couples boning for hours every single day of the week. We’re also told that if you want sex *too* much, there must be something wrong with you. It’s hard to navigate these images without the feeling that you’re coming up short in some way.
So what’s the “right” amount of sex to have? What is normal? If you do a Google search using the question posed, you’ll find millions of results and article after article about sexual desire and communication. Everyone has a different opinion and many of these opinions change from year to year.
The level of sexual desire one has will always vary! There is no “normal.” Strike that word from your vocabulary now. Whatever you enjoy safely and consensually is a-okay!
If you feel that you’re not having enough sex, take an inventory of how you’re feeling overall. Have you been sick recently or do you have a chronic illness or disability that makes having sex less than optimal for you at times? Are you stressed about things going on at work or at home? Maybe you’re just plain tired and not getting enough sleep. If you have a partner(s), how’s your relationship going? Are you feeling disconnected in any way? It might be a good time to do an emotional check-in with your partner about how you’re both feeling if you haven’t been getting it on recently. They might also be experiencing a low sex drive or their own stresses or aches. Communicate your needs and see if that helps you get back on track.
If you feel that you’re having *too* much sex, well… you probably aren’t unless it’s distressing to you, you’re finding it difficult to accomplish other, non-sexual things, or it’s physically hurting you and/or your partner(s). If everything’s cool on those fronts, I say keep on having fun and don’t worry that you’re abnormal. You’re not. You just like a lot of sex!
I recommend some time and energy devoted to determining what amount of sex feels right to you. Do some journaling; make some notes about your own desire. How much sex feels healthy? Are there times when your drive is overwhelming? Are you worried about your lack of libido? What might stand in the way?
It’s also really important to ask these questions of yourself before communicating with your partner(s) about what you need and want. But I do highly recommend discussing these issues with your partner and checking in about what works for them.
All in all, dear reader, I hope you know that ideas of what’s “normal” shift over time and are based on social mores of whatever time we’re living in. The frequency with which most adults have sex now would probably be unheard of a hundred years ago. And a hundred years from now, it will be different again. As long as you’re staying safe and healthy and consensual, have as much or as little sex as you’d like. It’s ALL good!
*Unfortunately, after finishing this piece I found out that Korppi King is no longer on social media. If she ever decides to recreate her social media profiles, I will update this post with her new information!
Recently, some of you may have noticed me talking a lot about my ‘missing’ orgasms. It’s not like I don’t have them, they are just very hard to come by. It makes me sad, mad, frustrated, and sometimes a little crazy. My own personal mental and physical health issues are huge factors, I know this, but I can’t be alone. I need to know that I am not the only person who can’t cum within mere minutes of diddling.
My solo orgasm, with a toy, took approx 25 minutes. The average ‘aroused’ vulva having person takes about 20 minutes to orgasm, while the average penis having person only takes about 5 minutes. That is just the average. In reality, I’m with a partner that has a hard time lasting 5 minutes, and I last much longer than the ‘average’ 25 minutes. Not really a great mix. We’re definitely working on it all. With him we’ve tried cock rings and other methods, which seem to be working great, so don’t feel too bad.
Some (bio)logical reasons for my lack of orgasms or difficulty finding them could be my anti anxiety meds or my PCOS. It’s fairly common for anti anxiety meds to reduce libido so that could be something to explore. I am currently taking 40mg of Prozac every day, which isn’t the highest dosage but I take it alongside Buspirone. Prozac is one of the worst SSRIs for sexual drive, so there’s really no surprise there. I am actually going to start halving my dosage gradually to see how that affects everything. Unfortunately, it can take up to 2 months to start to see any changes.
With PCOS, my hormones are all sorts of fucked up so I’m sure that plays into it sometimes. Also, with PCOS, changes in libido are very common. Low testosterone levels usually lead to a low libido. On the other hand, like me, high testosterone issues lead to high libido, but it also leads to some other not-so-attractive issues. Besides libido, PCOS may be a factor in sensitivity and mental health problems surrounding the illness.
I’ve also found that a lot of my issues come from mental blocks. My ex was abusive as I have talked about many times. He used orgasms as a ‘punishment’ when he was upset. He ended up bruising my pelvic bone a few times with how rough he was with me. I ended up having to continuously fake my orgasms just to get him to stop. As a result, I didn’t have my first partnered orgasm until a couple months into my relationship with my husband. I was sick of lying about it and I told him that I had been faking. It wasn’t until a few days ago that I really understood why.
Within the last few days I have been diving deep into my past and traumas to maybe find something there. Yes, I was abused as a child, yes, I had an extremely abusive ex, but I never saw anything there to indicate why those events were affecting what was happening now, with the exception of the fact that I still have some insecurities about whether or not I ‘deserve’ to be worshiped and given orgasms, even solo.
Most of the time I feel like my partner is getting bored or is hurting his arm/legs/jaw in some way because it’s taking too long. He has REPEATEDLY told me this is not the case. He loves making me cum no matter how long it takes because he likes to think of it as a fun challenge. One of his favorite things is watching me get off and maybe that pressure doesn’t help. The idea that I can’t a lot of the time makes me feel so self conscious and frustrated. I feel like I’m letting both of us down. I’m a sex blogger for fucks sake. My job is to have orgasms.
I also found out a weird thing. Before my accident, when I hated my body, I was entirely able to have partnered orgasms and easy solo orgasms. Now, I love my body and it’s the hardest thing in the world. Maybe before I thought about my body so entirely that the other stuff never came to mind, and now I have nothing to distract myself from the possibility of being annoying.
As for solo orgasms, I feel like a major factor in my issues with those is the expectation of an orgasm. I cannot stop thinking about what will get me off versus what feels really good. I mean, it all feel amazing, but even when I’m just playing with myself, I get the anxiety thoughts of ‘this is taking too long, you’re not normal’.
I was reading another sex blog the other day and the author was saying that 10 minutes to orgasm was a long time and it was frustrating for her. While I do understand that every body and mind is different, I would KILL to have an orgasm in 10 minutes. This is definitely the type of stuff that I should not be focusing on, but most of the time I can’t help it when thoughts like this pop into my head.
My partner has been so supportive through all of this. His sex drive isn’t as high as mine so sometimes he doesn’t really mind, but he definitely sympathizes with how frustrating this is for me, someone who used to be a 2+ times per day masturbater. While I’m waiting to see if reducing my medication dosage makes things better, we’re still going to work on everything as if that isn’t going to help. Hopefully, eventually, I can focus of the moment instead of that huge pressure to have an orgasm.
Since sex drive, wetness, and most other things that go along with ‘sexual dysfunction’ are not an issue, we’ll continue on the path of toys. Since both of my jobs are all about sex toys, I have a plethora. Changing it up seems to help, but when I’m having a particularly rough couple of weeks, I like to stick to what I know. That way there are no surprises (good or bad). This helps me stay more focused because I know what that particular toy does for me.
When I am having problems for a long period of time, the thing that has worked for me is extreme distraction. I usually blast a fan and some music just to get my mind off of life. The fan is great white noise and the music I chose usually has really harsh beats that I can find a toy or finger rhythm to.
The most important thing that I can express to anyone who is reading this who is having issues is communicate. Whether that be to a partner, a doctor, a therapist, etc, just talk. Make sure the people who need to know (and should know) what is going on inside your head are kept in the loop. Also, of you’re considering going on or off medication ALWAYS talk to a doctor. These types of medications are no joke.
I have been married to an amazing person for almost 10 years. We are best friends, we tell each other everything, we’re open and honest, and we never let things fester. Lately, I had been having some pretty serious thoughts about our relationship. After a couple of weeks of mulling things over, I decided I had thought about it enough on my own and now it was time to sit down and discuss it.
I told him that I had been getting turned on by the idea of another person fucking me, him knowing, and getting turned on by that, or even joining in. I had learned a while ago that a lot of men actually have this fetish as well, so I was curious about his thoughts on all of it. I knew that we had discussed it being his fetish when we first got engaged, but I don’t remember much else around that time.
When we met, I was with an awful human being. This man was physically, mentally, emotionally, and sexually abusive. When I met my husband, he quickly became my best friend, and eventually helped me escape that relationship.
After I had left my ex, I had a lot of healing to do, both from him and from past sexual traumas. Apparently, for me to heal, I needed to block out certain chunks of time from around the end of that relationship, to about 6 months into my new one. I had no idea that I had done this, until my husband mentioned that we had actually started practicing this lifestyle, and apparently I had a part time girlfriend. We would would fool around while he was at work, and then at one point, we had a threesome…all for me.
It was like one of those movie moments. The camera pans in really fast on my eyes as they widen from some amazing realization. I FINALLY REMEMBERED! Like most moments in your life when you remember a lot of stuff all at once, I got very emotional. I realized that my past traumas had prevented me from just BEING for a large chunk of my life and I was remembering all the things my brain had allowed me to forget. It was rough.
I was suddenly remembering all of the trauma my ex had put me through, specifically sexually, and I hated him so much more. I allowed this piece of shit to ruin my self image. He took away my ability to love myself and to feel like I deserved to be loved. He put me in so many situations that I hated myself for and forced a lifestyle onto me that I wasn’t ready for. He knew this, but never cared. One of the major non-physical traumas that happened during our relationship was, for a whole week he was fucking 2 other people and telling me that he was at the hospital with his grandfather. I only learned about that one after I had left him, hence the continued need for healing for a few months after that relationship had ended.
After speeding through all THAT lovely imagery, I got to my current relationship, and all the blocked out chunks of time within it. I remembered all of our conversations about loving each other, the fact that his sex drive isn’t what I need sometimes, and that lack of jealousy isn’t lack of love. Being so young and having gone through all that shit when we got together, I didn’t quite understand why he was so OK with this. I was confused and I thought that him ‘not caring’ about me sleeping with other people for a fetish we had, meant that he’d be out sleeping with people too, all the while telling me that ‘it’s for the fantasy’, and making me believe that I was the one who was wrong and/or crazy.
That was never the case, and in fact, we were extremely hot and heavy during all of this. The only reason why we stopped being part of that lifestyle, was that we moved. It seemed like our move away, forced me to start healing. We never mentioned it again and all of our experiences fell away.
Fast forward to 2018 when I got into my massive car accident and everything changed. Like I’ve mentioned before and in my ‘About’ bio, I suddenly began to love myself again. Having a near death experience can do that. After the accident, we had found our fire again. I was no longer self conscious of my body, so I was extremely free to explore my new found sexuality.
A few months later I began to explore the world of sex work. I LOVED it. After I stopped, I actually missed it, and I started to wonder why. I figured out the reason was because I was being adored and lusted after by other people. That lust and adoration was directly linked to my amazing ‘IRL’ sex life. After I stopped being a sex worker, our sex life slowed down again. It wasn’t as bad as before the accident, but it was definitely noticeable. Since I DID remember that in the past he had mentioned this fetish to me, I decided to take a stab at doing some of my own research. Turns out that’s exactly what I wanted as well.
When we finally sat down to talk, things were amazing. We talked about communication, boundaries, fantasies, and rules. I thought he would be totally against the idea of even discussing it, but after the realization that I probably should have gone to more therapy, things just clicked. I remembered that in my sexual history I had had a grand total of 3 threesomes, and I loved every minute of it. I remember being the center of attention for most of those events and at that point I couldn’t keep my hands off of him. We spent the next hour having amazing sex (since all that talk of other people fucking me was basically hardcore foreplay) and over the next few days we would talk some more.
Now that things are all out in the open, we’re giving it some time. We’ve gone back to having amazing sex, pretty much any time we can, and in a few months we’re going to re-discuss this lifestyle (and possibly give it a try). We’ve done solo research and partnered research all to identify the exact relationship style we’d like to have, so that there is no questioning the rules and boundaries we will be setting.
The reason why I decided to tell you this story is to show you just how important communication and honesty are within ANY type of relationship. Whether that be casual, non monogamous, open, poly, etc, you need to talk. I told him about my ideas, he told me about his worries, and so on. We understand that talking and not letting things get bottled up is the only way that we can successfully explore our options and have a healthy relationship.
[If you need/want to talk about your own experiences please do not hesitate to email me or DM me on social media]
Uberlube is very, very fun! I finally got a sample from Lovers the other day I just couldn’t wait to try it. I have heard so many amazing reviews about this stuff, and they are all SPOT ON. This product is not just for sex, oh no. This is a multi purpose serum and it is magical.
Uberlube is 100% vegan, cruelty free, with no parabens, gluten, glycerin, flavors, or scents. It is made up of Dimethicone, Dimethiconol, Cyclomethicone, and Tocopheryl Acetate (aka Vitamin E). An awesome bonus is that it is registered medical quality.
Uberlube’s intended uses are for sex (obviously), sport, and style. What?! Sport and style?? How do I use this for those things?? Keep reading to find out!
Uberlube is silicone based, so use with toys is tricky, but not impossible. Silicone toys can have a bad interaction with silicone based lubes and can start breaking down. You can test how your toy will react by doing a test swatch. Put the lube on a very small area of your toy, leave it for a couple minutes, then wash it off really good. After you wash it off, if your toy has any discolorations, odd textures, or is sticky, don’t use that lube with that particular toy.
This stuff is amazing. It is like the ‘Energizer Bunny’ of lubes. It keeps going, and going, and going, and going, and…well you get the picture. The consistency of this lube is wonderful. It’s not sticky at all, but it’s also not too runny (see pictures below). If we continue on the path of metaphors, one might call the it, the ‘Goldilocks’ of the lube world…*wink*
Uberlube is great for sex in any capacity. The first thing that I tried was some old school finger masturbation. Using this lube was mind blowing to say the least. I think I had the quickest, most powerful orgasm I’d had in months, if not years. The goal of Uberlube is reduce friction, not sensation. That is exactly what it did. Good Goddess this stuff is fucking brilliant. I am hoping to try it on some non silicone toys in the near future, so stay tuned!
The next thing to be tried using Uberlube was penetration, of all kinds. Whatever type of penetration you enjoy, be it fingers or penis into a vagina or butt, you will LOVE this stuff. My partner and I had the best anal sex we’d had in a while. This stuff doesn’t give up and you feel everything! It is wonderful. Like I said before, I haven’t tried this with any toys, but I’m under the assumption that use of this lube with any said toy will be extremely pleasurable. No matter what, though, always try all your lubes on your toys before use, just to be safe.
Also, for those of you that practice safe sex with condoms, first, good for you, second, this lube is condom friendly. Since this is an silicon based lube, it is perfect for use with all latex and polyisoprene condoms. The only condoms I would worry about is polyurethane, although I’m not to sure many brands use that material anymore. Side note: If you use oil based lubes, those are NOT latex friendly.
Like I mentioned in the beginning of this post, Uberlube is wonderful for more than just sex. This stuff works wonders for sports, all types of athletic activity, or just everyday wear. It is water proof, sweat proof, and it lasts for hours. Rub it on your thighs, or anywhere, for chafe protection, or for a dash of moisture with the vitamin E. The best part is that it doesn’t leave you feeling greasy and it will eventually dissolve so you’re not left with a gross residue. As a plus sized woman, this stuff is a lifesaver for my chub rub!
Now for the fun and unexpected part, using Uberlube for ‘Style’. When I read that salons, and other people, use Uberlube for their hair, I was very skeptical, until I used it. Let me tell you, this stuff is amazing! My hair is fried from years of bleaching and box dying, but with just a couple of drops, none of that mattered. My hair was left soft and frizz free. Also, since Uberlube is oil free, your hair doesn’t feel nasty or heavy.
Uberlube comes in 15ml refillable cases, which is perfect for travelling. You can also get it in 100ml and 50ml. Whatever you use it for, or wherever you need to bring it, you’ll be sure to find what you need. Plus, the glass bottle looks really nice and sleek.
If you want to buy Uberlube go to your nearest sex shop, seriously. This shit is everywhere. But, if you do your shopping online, check out these stores:
Get it HERE and use code PINKSPACELIME to get $10 off your first $50 order PLUS free shipping on orders over $55
I purchased this product with my own funds. If you wish to help me purchase more products to review head to my ‘Goodies‘ page. If you wish for me to review one or more of your products, contact me! I would love to hear from you!
I never thought I would even consider being a sex worker. I had so many ideas of what sex workers did, looked like, felt about themselves, etc. All of my preconceived notions of sex work were 100% wrong. After completing this experiment I realized that sex work can be fun, lucrative, and an amazing self confidence booster. It’s the rest of the world that makes it out to be this dirty, immoral, thing. This is my experience as a BBW (Big Beautiful Womxn) sex worker.
Why Did I do this experiment?
The first reason why I decided to try sex work is to simply see if I could. Being a bigger woman, I was unsure of the need. I did my research and found that there are many, beautiful, full figured women in the sex worker industry. After thinking it through, and doing so much research, I decided why not, and jumped in.
I really wanted to experience what these wonderful people go through. Now I only did it for 2 weeks, so I probably didn’t get the full experience, but I loved it. No wonder people do this!! I was worried my self confidence would be shit, or I would get nothing but nasty comments, but that didn’t happen, much to my surprise.
One of the most surprising things that came from all of this was my self confidence boost. Before I started this experiment, my self confidence was growing every day, but this shot it to 11 within 48 hours. I’m still not too sure why this happened, but I loved it.
Speaking of self confidence, the sex life with my partner was reignited to the extreme. I used to hate my body. I would be so self conscious about any sort of intimacy. Now I don’t give a fuck. I love my rolls, my marks, my hair, etc. I sincerely love myself and the way I look. Making that mental change within myself made our physical relationship so much stronger.
I honestly got so many less nasty comments than I thought I would get. The nastiest comments I got were about my lack of content, not my actual content. If you’re worried about people being blatantly mean and cruel about your appearance, don’t. It didn’t happen. I’m sure the professionals get their fair share, but I feel like they love themselves too much to care about one salty perv.
The most surprising ‘pro’ is that I made a few sales! I only had a few videos but I sold 2 and had one Premium Snapchat subscriber. This was just in 2 weeks. That’s amazing! I cannot even begin to imagine what things would look like had I continued this journey. There are always people willing to buy the goods you have to give.
The major con is a pretty obvious one: you have to deal with the perverts. Most of the time the only messages I received were dick pics or dudes trying to get a free sext session out of me. The biggest surprise came about a week in, when I had started posting on Reddit. Someone actually asked me if they could jerk off to a picture of my tits. I thought that was super sweet and flattering that he would ask first.
Another pretty obvious con is that so many people will bitch at you about not giving it away for free. That’s all. Just block them if they bitch you out, but a lot of the time once they know you’re a professional they will just go on their way. I had a few ‘thank you for the offer, maybe another time’, which is super thoughtful.
This profession takes a lot of personal upkeep of home and self. I found myself spending quite a bit of time and money on shaving and home decoration. You are giving people a fantasy. You need it to be the best it can be, especially when they’re paying for it. If you’re doing free shows, fuck it, but the paid stuff should be top quality.
Sex work and adult entertainment is a very over saturated market. That’s going to a be a problem with any career moving forward though. This planet is so overpopulated so there’s going to be hundreds, if not thousands, of people doing exactly what you are doing. If you do it, do it for fun and be pleasantly surprised, or do it so well you get noticed.
The last con is more of an inconvenience than a ‘con’, but either build up a lot of content or prepare for lulls. Some days you’re not going to want to do anything (like any job) so it’s good to have some content to post when that happens. Your fans will NOTICE if you don’t post.
There are a lot of applications and websites to use in the sex worker industry. I’ve gone ahead and listed all the ones that I used. I will let you know all the uses for said apps and sites, as well as which ones to avoid and why.
I reached out to a fellow sex worker/adult entertainer and asked her what her favorite apps to use were. She immediately suggested that I use the app CashApp to accept my funds from people and direct deposit for use on websites. She said to never use PayPal because they will put a hold on your account for ‘Adult Activity’ and you’ll never get your money.
Setting up a CashApp account is pretty easy. It’s basically like PayPal with less restrictions. Plus, they will send you a personalized debit card, that has your signature etched into the front. It looks very sleek and professional.
The first app I knew I wanted to use was Snapchat. I had seen the term ‘Premium Snapchat’ thrown around like it was confetti. I did some digging and figured out how to set it up. The basics of setting up a premium Snapchat are: make a private Snapchat account. That’s it. From there you can have people DM you for details via Instagram, Twitter, etc, or you can use a website like Fancentro (see below).
When you get your DMs asking for access to your premium Snapchat, make sure the first thing you do is give them your CashApp handle. This is a business transaction. They are paying you for your services. Once they have sent you proof that they have paid, send them your Snapchat name. Never give away anything you’re not comfortable with for free. People will take advantage of that.
Snapchat was really fun. I only ever had one subscriber, but he was really nice. Only once did he get a little testy with the ‘lack of content’ I was putting up. Although, after talking to my friend, I realized he was just greedy, because I was putting up 4-5 things per day, whereas she maybe put up one thing per day. Other than that interaction, I really enjoyed myself. I knew my snaps were only going to one person, so I could have as much fun as I wanted without feeling overwhelmed.
Fancentro is like the manager for your premium Snapchat. There, buyers can purchase different subscription tiers, and they get to see a little bit of content before they purchase. Fancentro is like your home base for different subscription services. You can offer private Snapchat, private Instagram, you can add your Amazon Wishlist, and other fun goodies for people to spoil you with. I highly recommend using Fancentro to organize your subscription services.
A really good way to promote yourself as an ‘Adult Entertainer’ or ‘Sex Worker’ is on Twitter. There are so many people to network and collaborate with. You can post all the raunchy stuff you want and you will most likely never get shut down or banned. This is a great platform for marketing your other paid sites.
Never use Instagram to promote your sex work. You will get your account taken down faster than you can say ‘Free the Nipple’.
ManyVids is where the money is at. Put up enough porn and inevitably someone will buy it. I had a grand total of 6 videos, and in 2 weeks I got 2 sales. That doesn’t seem like a lot, but when I was full expecting to not sell anything, two sales was winning the lottery. If you are comfortable with filming yourself doing the nasty or playing with yourself, I highly recommend doing it and putting it up on this site.
Not only was it REALLY fun, but I learned to love my body so much more after watching the videos I posted. I would find myself watching and re-watching all of my own videos. The bonus to learning to love yourself while doing this kind of work, is you really start to turn yourself on. I don’t think there was a single moment in the two weeks I was doing this that I wasn’t sopping wet.
Reddit is so important, but it’s very tricky. I got the most interaction while promoting myself on Reddit, but I also got laughed at the most for wanting people to pay for my goods. You have to be very careful that people don’t abuse your position as a sex worker. Reddit is where the true perverts live.
OnlyFans is only ok at the moment. OnlyFans is a newer site so there isn’t as much traffic, but I have a feeling that will soon change. Their aesthetic is much more pleasing than ManyVids and the interface is much more simple. It reminds me of when Tumblr was still cool. There’s a bio, a feed, and that’s it. It’s very simple.
The main difference between this site and ManyVids, is that it’s subscription based. You can offer monthly or lifetime subscriptions, but there isn’t more you get. All subscriptions get the same content, just longer or shorter access. If you were to choose a site, I would do either this one or ManyVids. Having both was pretty redundant. OnlyFans is also a great place to permanently put your premium snaps.
Patreon is interesting because they really support the ‘artistic’ side of adult entertainment. Honestly, if you are an erotic model, I would only use Patreon. They have the ‘lens’ which basically acts as a Snapchat and you can still post exclusive porn to paying customers. You can be so much more creative with your subscription tiers and usually the subscribers are a lot more professional.
Overall, the cons were pretty much expected and the pros were a happy surprise. I could have never expected this outcome. I seriously thought I would come away from all of this hating myself and thinking I was so disgusting. That couldn’t be further from the truth. I loved almost every minute and I would probably do again if I had a little bit more patience.
I have a whole new respect for these wonderful people. They are so supportive of each other. If you know a sex worker, give them all your love and support. Fuck what anyone says. They are doing what they love, period. Treat them like human beings and pay for your porn!